Final Update 9/14/04: I received a phone call on September 14, 2004 at about 4pm. from my husband that my mother-in-law and father-in-law arrived at our house to find Ebony having seizures. I left work immediately to rush her to the vet. We got to the vet and I knew pretty much all the way there that it might be time to say goodbye to one of my best friends that I have known for 20 years.

They took her back immediately and got the seizure to stop. She looked so awful on the way there and my father-in-law said that her seizures were worse at times before I got home. She got worse on the way to the vet. The Dr. came back and said that she had good color and a good heartbeat. She gave her some valium and she was resting okay. She said that they don't normally see seizures with kidney disease unless they get considerably worse fast. She said we could do a blood test to see how the disease has progressed and it might be a better indication on how to make our decision. They also asked us if she got into anything in the house. I told them that was highly unlikely since she has been so lethargic lately and been sleeping a lot and not functioning well.

We waited about half an hour and the results were as expected, it had gotten worse and even though the Dr. said she has seen worse, it wasn't good. She said they could get fluids down her and monitor for the next couple of days to see if she produced any urine, but there is no fix. Which we knew. She said it is so hard to determine because there is no way to know how she would respond and exactly how much kidney function she had left. She could possibly only get worse and have seizures again and we could spend $400 (the estimate) to keep her there and give her fluids for it only to get worse. My husband met me at the vet and we discussed how she had been doing. She wasn't her normal self, she hasn't been eating as much, going to the bathroom hardly at all, and begging for her canned food like normal. We knew she was going down hill. And, after much crying and debating we decided it was time to say goodbye. This is what sucks about being an adult to try and determine money wise and her health wise whether it was worth progressing her life longer. I didn't want to see her suffer more and who knew if she could have seizures again. It was inevitable. She had lost half a pound in only 3 days too, I knew that was not a good sign. She said she was dehydrated and she wasn't drinking much if anything.

I was only glad that she wasn't like that for hours and I went home to find her in severe pain or even dead. She might have been seizing for an hour or so, but my husband was home till around 2pm and his parents got there at 3:45pm. So hopefully, she wasn't in too much pain. The vet did say that cats don't even know that they are seizing and it wasn't extreme pain, but I can't imagine it was comfortable. They say afterwards they are really sore from it.

My husband and I decided to end her suffering and let her pass on. We had them bring her in and said good bye. We were with her when they put her to sleep. I debated about that for a while thinking if I wanted to, but now that I did, I am glad I did because I owed her that. She was my best buddy for 20 years and the best cat, I owed it to her to be with her when she died. I write this and do my best not to cry. Sometimes, I feel like such an awful person that I didn't pay more attention to her lately and how her life was in my hands, maybe I should have given her a few more days to see how it went, but it just didn't seem to make sense, she had a good life, 20 years, many cats don't get half that chance.

Since I had my baby, I knew she was jealous, but I gave her attention as I could and we loved her a lot. If I had only known yesterday that this was my last day with her I would have spent more time with her last night. God, sometimes that just kills me. But, she was loved very much and well taken care of. I know she knew that.

Needless to say, this day was not a good one. I always knew it was going to happen, but when you have this cat in your life for 20 years, it is hard, but then again, it is hard no matter how long I would have known her, if it had been 2 months or 20 years. I love my cats like they are my children. She went through my teenage years and college years with me. I had her over half of my life and I will never forget her. No one could ask for a better buddy then her.

Please see Ebony's Web Page for her memorial and to see just how much she touched my life.
 

Updated 9/11/04: We took Ebony and Xena in for their checkups. Ebony weighed in at only 5 1/2 pounds which to say the least she is becoming skin and bones. There isn't much left to her, but she has still been eating and getting around. Although, I have noticed that she has been much more slower and not begging for food as much. The vet said as we expected that she is getting worse. We didn't have her blood or urine checked, because it would only tell us that she is getting worse, so I didn't see a need to put her through it. They did recommend giving her fluids every few days. And, the Dr. recommended me giving them to her in shots or an IV. Well, to be honest, I don't know if I am up to that, not that I wouldn't do anything for my cats, but I guess the plan was to just keep her as comfortable as possible. I did have them give her a shot of fluids though while we were there and if need be, I will bring her back in as necessary for some fluids.

It is so dang hard to figure out what to do. I want to keep her healthy for as long as I can, but there has to be a point where you say you are doing all you can for her. The vet agreed that she was has had a GREAT life and they don't see many cats make it to 20 years old. So the plan is to keep an eye on her and she how she does. She has been throwing up a lot, which isn't a good sign as well. She said she might have 25% of her kidney function. I am a sucker for animals and I don't know if anyone can understand how much I love my animals, especially, since I have had Ebony since I was 8 years old. So, it is always hard to try and weigh exactly how much you want to spend and exactly what extremes you will go to help her remain comfortable. If I notice she isn't doing well, I will call them and perhaps take her in for some fluids. But, it isn't easy to get her there every few days with working and having a 6 month old. I feel like an awful person when I say that. Because, I would never just ignore a situation for my pets, they are like my children. But, I do know that she is still doing Okay and we will take it a day at a time and see how things go. I have to prevent from crying when thinking about her and this whole situation. I am such a softy for my cats and of course I don't want to think of the day when Ebony gets just too bad and we have to say good bye to her. I am afraid those days are fast approaching. We will do our absolute best to keep her comfortable. I ain't going to hold back on feeding her either (she is always begging for food constantly), let her be happy and live her life to the fullest.
 

Update 6/03/04: Ebony went in for another checkup along with Xena on May 29th to see how her kidney disease was progressing. I knew she had lost weight since last time leaving her weighing in at 5 1/2 lbs. Not good! They also took blood from Ebony to monitor her disease and the results were as we expected. Sadly, Ebony is slowly wasting away and loosing weight everyday. I don't know how much longer she has, but I do hope the days are good and as long as possible. I know that she is old and has had a good life, but still parting with her will be just as hard. But, I won't go into that right now. I'll treasure the time we have left together. We try to give her as much attention as we can. She has even came up to sleep with me at night which she hasn't done since Kathryn was born.

As far as the results of her blood test go, I talked to the Dr. today and she said that her disease has gotten progressively worse. She said that the first signs that it has gotten real bad is when she is throwing up all the time. And, sadly, she has been doing that. We even went out and bought a Bissell Pro Heat and came home to a nice mess in the basement. All in all, it isn't good news, but I know I will treasure the time I have with her now. Because, sadly things will only get worse! :(
 

Update 9/22/03: We took Ebony in along with Xena to get her weighed and have a checkup done to see how she was doing. Unfortunately, she has lost a quarter of a pound which isn't good. The vet kindly reminded me that it means her kidney disease is getting worse, which I knew. She weighs in at 6 3/4 lb. The vet did compliment her on her silky coat which meant that she is still doing good and she said for her age and her condition she seems to be doing pretty well. I am sure in a few months I will need to take her back in along with Xena for another checkup.
 

Update 6/30/03: Here it was June again and time for our cat's yearly checkups. Ebony weighed in only at 7 1/4 pounds, which was less than last time. The vet recommended with her age that we do some blood work on her. That, and with her loosing weight, I figured it wouldn't be a bad idea.

Unfortunately, the results were not positive. The blood work came back that Ebony is showing signs of kidney failure. Her kidneys are operating slightly worse then Xena's. This was not good news. I have had this cat since I was 8 years old and the thought of having to part with her soon will not be easy to say the least. Anyhow, the vet recommended trying to switch her to the same food that Xena is on to maintain her kidney function. We will work on that, but I have a feeling she will not adjust easily. If she doesn't then we figure she is old and might as well be happy for as long as possible.

Hopefully, she stays healthy for a while longer and we don't have to worry about parting with her real soon. It is hard to imagine what it would be like without her.